


Of Emotions

by blowinduck



Series: Rush minific Series [8]
Category: Rush (2013)
Genre: Emotions, Fluff, M/M, not really but a bit ansgty
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-02-19
Updated: 2014-02-19
Packaged: 2018-01-13 02:25:18
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 421
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1209316
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/blowinduck/pseuds/blowinduck
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Niki has never been good with emotions. </p>
<p>A study in Niki Lauda and his emotions</p>
            </blockquote>





	Of Emotions

Niki has never been good with emotions.

In his mind they are a distraction, something that comes obtrusively at the most inconvenient moments, clouding his mind.

Is not that he can’t feel them or that he regards them as a weakness; the problem in his particular case is that he feels  _too much_. His emotions are raw, explosive; when they set loose they are like an unstoppable force, out of control.

He has learned through his life that emotions like that can be dangerous.

That’s one of the reasons he drives cars at the limit of speed. The whole thing is like a cathartic exercise to him; having all those raw emotions: fear, adrenaline, death and life, and having to force himself into focus, keeping himself alert while the blood pumps deafeningly on his ears.

All that self-control he uses on the track is the same he uses off of it, in his life. People have called him cold and rude, but they had never taken the time to see that is the only way Niki can remain sane, and that is all that matters in the end. People can go fuck themselves.

This is also the reason why he became attracted to the puzzle that James Hunt is.

Firstly, he hasn’t known in his life a person able to use emotions to their advantage like James Hunt does.

The idiot lives between nights in bars, is a complete careless mess and the time a emotion gets the best of him is before a race. In spite of that, when the asshole jumps into his car is like if neither of the above had occurred. He takes life as it comes and is unfazed by it.

Secondly, James Hunt is the first person that doesn’t run away from Niki.

It is as if James understood what goes inside his mind and accepts it like that. He brushes Niki’s emotional incompetence away with a smile and gives Niki space when he needs it; without pressure, without harsh complaints; he just waits patiently for Niki and then helps him relax, soft kisses taking down one by one his walls, staying there when the raw emotions are the only thing left. He helps him go through each one and let them go.

And Niki is fine with it.

There is no overwhelming sensation of impending chaos or shame afterwards when James is around.

James focuses him and Niki is aware of how utterly intoxicated he is by how safe this man makes him feel.

**Author's Note:**

> I have been doing my fair research on personalities and the different approaches on which they are studied, and reading along this came to mind. I took a lot of artistic liberties and, this being my interpretation on him, I don't pretend to call myself an expert and claim this is gospel; this is just how I see and interpret him in my mind, feel free to disagree :)


End file.
